Day 1

So far so good .... it's been since about 10:30 last night when I had my last cigarette. After which, I took the remainder of the cigarettes in the pack, flooded them with water, squished the pack up and threw them away. I'm a little concerned about tonight but I'm sure that I can get through it. The hardest part so far, has been the mental part. Right now it's easy to not think about them, but once I'm home I'm afraid it'll be a different story.

It's the routine of it all .... sitting down, having dinner .... smoking a cigarette when I'm nice and full. Relaxing, smoking a cigarette and watching TV ..... driving ..... driving's going to be tough! But again, I have faith in myself and I know that I can do this ....

I just have to remember and keep thinking about how good I feel and how nice it is not to be chained to a pack of cigarettes and think "ok, do I have enough to get me through tonight and at least in to work where I can buy more when needed? Maybe I should just stop on my way home and pick up a pack just to be on the safe side". Which inevitably leads to smoking more that night b/c I know I've got plenty to get me through.

I know ... it's gross and doesn't make any sense ... that's how it goes though